Tag Archives: text

Debate or Discussion?

Debate, discussion, communication and opinions.

I’m all for a robust discussion. A disagreement. A difference if opinion. Bring it on.

But so often what I’m seeing from my inside my computer, as a busy mum and blogger is that the average person is hitting the keyboard and secretly saying things online they would never dream of saying in real life.

Words, that they are humiliated and ashamed to say or even own when they are either confronted or are outed.

It’s enough. People are very much I feel happy to write the abusive email, quick text of anger and or a message of nastiness not even thinking of the implications. By hitting send in any communication form or hanging up the phone after that mean message, there will always be implications.

We all have opinion’s and we are all very much entitled to this, please remember though, your message, text, call, email may just be the final tip that really hurts someone, hurts their feelings, emotions and is unrepairable. If you send this to someone who is possible suffering depression or who may be suicidal or in a terrible frame of mind it could be the worst decision ever.

Think before your send. I’ve said this before but every action has a reaction.

You don’t necessarily know how the receiver is feeling of what they are going through. Be kind.

We’re better than this. All of us.

Communication etiquette

Communication etiquette

I have met some wonderful new friends lately and some of them are married to men with ex wife’s.

I guess with the Australian divorce rate at 43% many relationships have ex wife’s or husbands. In saying that though, statistics show that if you marry after the age of 30 your marriage is more likely to go the distance.

Chatting with my new friends we were discussing how their partner communicates with the ex. Most of them have children involved so they have to communicate but it interested me as to how they communicate and how often.

To my surprise the ex wife’s of most of these men are quite demanding with communication. Don’t they realise their ex has moved on and is remarried with a new family?

There is this one ex who still signs off with a ‘x’ now to me and most of my friends an ‘x’ is a kiss right? I asked my new friend if her hubby and his ex were close. Her response was ‘no, but I think the ex does it to erk me’. Now this isn’t a surprise to me as I’ve had my fair share of dealing with troublesome ex’s however my thoughts were, ‘how immature’.

Another new friend was telling me that her hubby’s ex wife will text at all hours and demand that he response and is asking for all types of things, mostly asking for money having to to pay for extras on top of her child maintenance but also complaining that she can’t get a sitter to watch the child so can he take time off from work to have him? If he says no she plays the guy card saying that the child would really like to see him and misses him and please can’t it just be in his lunch break. If my friend wasn’t as trusting and confident in her marriage and also knowing how much her hubby dis likes his ex wife, this could have ruined their relationship.

Now we all know some women can be like this however how would they feel if the tables were reversed and it was an ex wife contacting their new husband if they were to have one? My guess is they wouldn’t like it too much as must people with these personality types are generally selfish, jealous and controlling.

Statistics show that most women have a fear of being alone and also letting go. Is this why some insist on still being part of the ex hubby’s life and like to cause drama within his new family? It makes me wonder, do they enjoy being a ‘pest’?

Another new friend also told me that her hubby’s ex wife emailed him asking for a ‘one night stand’ as she wanted another child but wanted her children to have the same father. I find this very weird and asked if this was before my friend and her hubby were together. To my response she replied with ‘nope, we had been together about ) months, I’d met their children and she knew of me’.

Another says that the ex sends the child to their house wearing clothes that are either 3 sizes too small or completely ruined, knowing that it’s embarrassing for both the child and the step mother so that the step mother will go and buy new ones but then when the child wears them back to his mothers / ex wife she then doesn’t return them. Apparently this is a continuos thing and constant battle with the hubby’s new family.

Another says that her and her hubby pay the private school fees along with extra sporting activities and purchase all the school uniforms on top of child support otherwise the mother / ex wife doesn’t buy them and the child misses out. She claims she can’t afford it?

I thought that child support us 19% of the non living with parents salary paid monthly to the parent who the child lives full time with? All of this to my knowledge is what child support is supposed to pay for? Some women are getting $280 per week for 1 child whom she only has 3 day one week and 6 the next so only having the child 9 days out of 14 but insisting on being paid high child support and extra.

Where do you draw the line?

You don’t want you child to ‘miss out’ on things.

Seriously, what are some people thinking? Or are they not thinking?

Apparently these women think that any time is sufficient.

So what do you think is appropriate etiquette for contacting ex’s?

I have friends that don’t contact at crazy hours nor do my family. General consensus is common courtesy right? What time would you find appropriate for calling or texting someone?