Tag Archives: Pregnant

The 3rd child?

So on the weekend my husband bought up the ‘3rd’ child question….

We currently have a 3yo boy and a 17mo girl. I feel complete, and extremely blessed. One of each is perfect for me. I have enough time with each and was questioning how would I manage another? We are in a great routine, they play so well together, they both sleep through the night, they adore each other, why ‘rock the boat’ so to speak.

Well firstly I was extremely shocked that my hubby bought this subject up, as he was the one that never wanted children. I basically gave him the ultimatum. He knew that when he proposed he was definitely having babies with me. He still proposed so he must not have worried too much about this.

Once we had our little man he then again said, no more babies I want my wife back and one is plenty, well again we had a chat and yes, we now also have a daughter. We have 2 amazing, gorgeous, smart, fun, happy and healthy little people. I feel completely besotted by them and am happy with the 2 children so you can imagine the shock when hubby bought up a third.

He was away last week for business and clearly missed us. His conversation Saturday went something like this.
‘Babe, do you ever get a pang for another baby?’

Well I nearly fell off my chair and replied, ‘yes I do, but I thought we agreed that the 2 that we have are perfect?’.

Hubby’s response, ‘after being away the past week I really missed you, little man and princess, I was thinking about having a third with you, would you consider it? Would you put your body through it again?’ (FYI, I get really bad morning/ all day sickness, with complicated pregnancy and difficult to actually fall pregnant)

My response, ‘I would put my body through it, absolutely, but we have 2 amazing little ones, do we really want a third?’

Hubby, ‘Hmmm I know, I just think how great a mum you are, how much our kids adore you and how beautiful our kids are, gives me pangs’.

Me, ‘Hmmm’.

So this was never a position I thought I’d be in. I’m pretty sure I’m completely happy with 2, I am one of 3 and remember that one of my siblings was always left out. I feel like 2 always play together and 1 is on the outer? Not sure. I think I’d want 4 rather than 2.

I know I have enough love.

We will see…..

http://www.scarymommy.com/the-day-i-fell-in-love-with-having-two/?utm_source=FB

Split families

Split Families.

I visited a friend recently who is in a similar position to myself. She had married a man who has children to his previous wife. 4 in fact.

Being that school holidays had just finished and a few more were just around the corner we were chatting about school holidays and how do they split them and also if she includes his children in in all their holidays.

Her response was very truthful and I agree.

She said they do split them but as her husband works full time and long hours, when his children are with them for the holidays he arranged for them to stay with his parents – the Childrens grandparents, half the time so that she doesn’t have to change her plans or do the running around after them. After all she said – quote – ‘they are not my children and they require a lot of work and it’s also important for them to see and spend time with their grandparents’.

I understand that this may offend some people but I think it’s a smart move. She has a 3 year old with her husband and is pregnant with their second child. She said their 3 year old is her main responsibility and that the other children are also old enough to be self sufficient.

Their ages are varied between 13 to 17. I agree that they are old enough to be self sufficient.

I also know that a toddler is busy and does require a lot of attention.

So when she said that her husband also believes that they should be doing things including ‘alone’ holidays with just them 2 (adults/parents/her and him/hubby and wife) and their child I was intrigued as I know my husband thinks that step children should be included in everything.

I asked why he says they need to do things with ‘just them’ and her response was ‘although he loves all his children it’s important for us to do things alone as our family, we do separate holidays with his children but he understands the importance of us having our time together. Me him and our son’.

I was impressed that her husband understands this as most split families are not as open minded and some have a sense of ‘guilt’ so therefore go over and beyond to try and make the step children or children to previous relationships feel super important and in most cases they get all the attention and are not self sufficient as they are mollycoddled. Or felt sorry for. (See previous post on step children which I write after meeting a family in fiji)

I get each family is different and everyone has different needs.

I also understand children to previous relationships still need to be included in some things but do they need to be included in everything?

Do you see importance of doing things as a family and not always having to include step children or children from previous relationships?

I think in most cases it will help the husband and wife’s relationship as my friend was saying that the 2 younger step children are quite jealous of the 3 year old and if her husband is playing with the 3 year old, the others interrupt and ask the father to do things that they know they 3 year old can do, that way the 3 year old is excluded.

What are your thoughts on this?

Do you think children to previous relationships should always be included in everything?

Should they get special treatment as the parents are no longer together?

Should there still be holidays for the new partner and their children?

Is it important to have separate holidays?

I’d love to hear from you – email me, noordinarymummy@gmail.com

 

Breech babies

Breech babies.

What is a breech baby?

Breech means that your baby is in a bottom-down position. If this is your first baby, the baby will probably settle into a head-down position in your pelvis around the eighth month of pregnancy. This settling position is called a vertex or cephalic position. When labour begins, nearly all (actually 96 per cent) of babies are lying head down in the uterus, but a few (about 3-4 per cent), will settle into a bottom-first, or breech, position.

I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant and had an ultrasound earlier last week only to find that my little miss has turned breech!

As soon as I saw this on the screen I cried. I’ve heard many horror stories about breech babies and how you can only deliver via c section and unfortunately for me, the select few people that I know who have had c sections – have unfortunately had terrible experiences. Not the most positive stories to be reassured by.

My first reaction – apart from crying was to do research on how I can turn my baby naturally or at least get her to turn herself back into the head first position.

I then started to research as to why some babies turn breech. My initial reaction was, pending your circumstances of course, and I’m not too spiritualistic but do have a tendency to prefer ‘natural’ techniques, remedies and options. So my initial thought was – gosh what has made my bubba want to be so close to my heart?

Apparently I am partially right – pending what you believe. I was in a circumstance a few days ago where I felt very uncomfortable with my surroundings. There was a certain person at the same venue as I was who made me feel very uneasy and as soon as I saw this person, my body covered itself in goose bumps and I felt a hot flush and got a horrible rush come over me. Approx 30 minutes after I felt my little miss become unsettled in my tummy and I knew something wasn’t right. Yes she has turned herself around into breech position! Again breech is where the baby’s head is up under the mothers chest / heart.

An old wives tale is that if the mother is under stress, heartache, or feeling anxious about anything the baby will turn breech to listen to the mothers heart beat and therefore feel more settled.

After my experience I believe that this could definitely be a factor as to why my little girl has decided to flip.

So back to the research!

I’ve read many ways to try and have her turn herself back into the vaginal birthing position some I’ve listed below.

Please note though – I am no medical expert, if you are pregnant – always, always seek medical advice and if your baby is also breech, please take the advice of your doctor.

An option that I’m having is an ECV this can be performed at 36 weeks, by your doctor or midwife.

This is where you have the chance to have your baby turned manually into a head-down position. This process is called external cephalon version (ECV).

ECV is more likely to work if you’ve given birth vaginally before. Sometimes, a baby refuses to budge or rotates back into a breech position so it is not a 100% going to work for all baby’s – or it may work but these little people do have a mind of their own and may very well turn back into breech position.

An ECV may be not recommended if you have bleeding during your pregnancy, if your baby has a short umbilical cord, if you have oligohydramnios (less amniotic fluid), if you have a scar on your uterus, if you are carrying more than one baby or that you are likely to need a caesarean section for other reasons.

In Australia, 87.1 per cent of babies who were in a breech position at full term (37 weeks or more of pregnancy) were born by caesarean section. This figure includes single babies as well as twins and more, where often there is one baby in a breech position. More than 95 per cent of singleton babies (where there is only one baby) who are breech at full term are born by caesarean section.

In most cases the caesarean is planned and the mother does not go into labour, though for 20 per cent of singleton breech babies the mother does go into labour before the baby is born by caesarean. In this situation the caesarean is usually more urgent.

A review of the research on breech birth in 2004 suggested that it was safer for breech babies to be born by Caesarean section compared to a vaginal birth.

Some midwives and doctors challenge this research. They feel that a normal birth is just as safe, provided that the midwife or doctor has the special skills needed to help a woman give birth to a breech baby vaginally.

Further studies have also supported the view that where there are experienced doctors available and strict guidelines applied, vaginal birth can be as safe as caesarean birth.

There is also no evidence that the way a term breech baby is born has any effect on his long term health.

A few other methods that I’ve read about to try are :

Bring your knee’s-to-chest position by kneeling on your bed or on the floor with your bottom in the air and your hips flexed at slightly more than 90 degrees (don’t let your thighs press against your bump).

Try to keep your head, shoulders, and upper chest flat on your mattress. Maintain this position for 15 minutes every two waking hours for five consecutive days. In one study of 71 breech babies, 65 turned when their mother adopted the knee to cheat position.

OR

Try laying on your back with your hips slightly elevated and again your hips and knees flexed. Gently roll from side to side for 10 minutes and repeat this manoeuvre three times a day. If you have had any back pain, pelvic pain or hip pain during your pregnancy, do talk to your midwife or physiotherapist before you try this.

At the end of the day it might be that your baby prefers to lie in the breech position; about 5 per cent even turn back to breech position after a successful ECV. If this is the case, a c section will probably be recommended but, depending on your baby’s exact position, a vaginal birth may still be possible.

I personally am hoping that my baby turns as I really am scared of a c section.

Have you had any experiences such as a c section or breech baby? If so please contact me, I’d love to hear your experience.

Another great website that a friend of mine also recommended – she is a midwife 🙂 is below; good luck!

http://spinningbabies.com

Being pregnant.

Being pregnant!

So I’m 31 weeks pregnant with my little princess and the count down is on!

I’m extremely excited to meet her and give my little man a sister and my hubby a daughter. The latter is possibly not the most appealing as hubby is worried about having a little girl, mainly her teenage years and how he can contain boyfriends, cosmetics, mood swings etc….. The best is yet to come!

This pregnancy has been similar but also very different to my first. I know they say no two are the same but I thought that possibly they could be, same mum – same dad, how different can it be?

Well to start with, my first notably is a boy and I’m expecting a girl.

Secondly even though I had morning / mourning sickness with my little man it was controllable. This time round I’ve felt terrible most days as have literally vomited every day and at no particular time.

Thirdly I have grown an enormous bottom! I carried my little man mostly in the tummy, yes I was big but at least I was still wearing my normal size pants. Ok no skinny jeans but tights and pants still fitted. This time, no chance! My hips feel double the size and yes they look it also, although my tummy isn’t very big? So I guess it’s true when they say you carry boys in front and girls in the back? (Old wives tale)

Fourth is the weight gain. First time around, I put on 17.5kgs….. This pregnancy I have only gained 9kg. I get that I still have approx 8-9 weeks to go but I can’t really see my self adding another 9kgs in that time frame? Well Id be shocked if I did.

Fifth is the sleep, or lack there of. It seems I get really tired especially as I am a stay at home mummy looking after my beautiful 2 year old boy who is super active and has recently decided to reject his day sleep, so from 6:30am until 6:30pm he is a little firecracker! An absolute ball of energy! However when I try to sleep or rest I seem to get energised.

Sixth, being uncomfortable. With everything! I can’t sit comfortably as my tummy seems to be right up under my nose and literally sits on my lap. Laying down I feel like I have an anchor pulling me to the side and let’s not forget the calf muscle aches and lower back pain. Again nothing like I experienced in my first pregnancy. This one has been tough. Especially the body aches.

Seventh, food and cravings. Mmmm well I don’t really feel like eating and the slightest aroma makes me want to vomit. No particular cravings this time around but first time was all about chocolate flavoured milk and chicken sandwiches on white bread.

Eighth would be the wriggles and movement. Gosh my little guy would wriggle and move all the time, however my little miss only at night. Day time she is quite still, well at least I don’t feel her as much but rest assured, as soon as I’m resting it laying trying to sleep, she wriggles and kicks and moves. Perhaps this is the beginning of her sleeping pattern? Is she going to be a restless or sleepless child? Only time will tell.

Ninth is the funny tastes I get in my mouth, sometimes it’s a metal taste almost like I have pieces of metal in my mouth? Or it can sometimes be the taste of acid, perhaps from the vomiting. Mostly it’s a thick non hungry taste almost like ice eastern too much? Bizzar I know but hard to explain.

I know this probably isn’t painting the best picture of pregnancy but I can guarantee that I will defiantly miss being pregnant. I do love and enjoy my tummy and the movement. The bonding where only I can feel her move. The special bond that only a mother can feel as the baby is in her tummy growing. I missed it with my little man and am sure that I will miss it again.

Although it hasn’t been easy I certainly don’t regret any moment of it. I love being pregnant and knowing that I am growing a human who is so innocent inside me makes me feel blessed.

I’m very much looking forward to the next chapter in my life of being a mummy to my two beautiful children. My little man whom is my prince, my darling, my solider, my best friend, my first child, my only boy, my everything and my little princess awaiting arrival.

She will no doubt be my gorgeous little girl, my darling princess, my best friend, my youngest child, my only daughter, my everything.

One child of each sex is all I need to complete my little family. I feel blessed and fulfilled with absolute happiness and excitement.

How have your pregnancy experiences differed to either mine or with each of your children? Id love to hear your stories. Email me noordinarymummy@gmail.com

Morning sickness!

Morning sickness!

For anyone that has suffered, I feel for you. With my first pregnancy I thought I had it bad. Vomiting, headaches, constantly tired, achy limbs, swollen ankles and that’s just what I remember.

This time around it’s worse! How could it possibly be worse you ask? Well it is. I’m vomiting all day, mostly bile and being graphic it also helps itself out my nose! Still all the body aches and headaches and super tired but hey, I’m growing a baby inside!

So yes, there is my announcement, we are pregnant and although I’m feeling absolutely rotten, I’m blessed and exited and extremely happy that I am having another child. Extending my family and giving my little guy a sibling.

So throughout all my morning sickness I’ve tried multiple remedies and let me say, not much has worked for me.

I’ve tried the dry crackers beside the bed first thing of a morning.

I’ve tried sipping sparkling water.

I’ve tried ginger tablets.

I’ve tried sea sick and travel sick tablets.

I’ve tried sucking ginger.

I’ve tried taking the morning sickness tables.

I’ve even tried maxalon!

Over tried dry toast.

I’ve tried black tea.

Nothing as worked for me.

So what causes morning sickness?

Below is an article by Victorian health that explains why we experience morning sickness and how we can try combat it!

I found it an interesting read, as most of you already know and understand, Morning sickness is caused by the hormones in your body adjusting and growing another little person inside you and with all the change it causes havoc in some women.

I’d love to hear your remedies or morning sickness stories.

Email me – noordinarymummy@gmail.com
Search:
For most women, morning sickness begins around the fourth week of pregnancy and generally goes away around the 12th to 14th week. However, bear in mind one in five pregnant women will suffer morning sickness into their second trimester, and an unfortunate few will also experience nausea and vomiting for the entire duration of their 9 month pregnancy.

In most cases, morning sickness doesn’t harm the woman or the unborn child. However, severe morning sickness that includes weight loss and dehydration needs prompt medical attention. This may also require a drip or even hospitalisation.
Some Symptoms of morning sickness can include:
Nausea
Loss of appetite
Vomiting
Psychological effects, such as depression and anxiety.

The myth of hysteria and morning sickness

Unrelenting morning sickness can have a profound effect on your quality of life, preventing you from working, socialising and looking after your other children.

Pregnant women enduring morning sickness report higher levels of psychological stress, including anxiety and depression. This prompted the false belief that morning sickness is purely psychosomatic, which means that the woman’s fears and anxieties trigger her physical discomfort. However, there is no research to support these claims.

Possible causes of morning sickness

The cause of morning sickness remains a mystery, but it is thought a combination of physical and metabolic factors play a significant role, including:
High levels of hormones, including oestrogen
Fluctuations in blood pressure, particularly lowered blood pressure
Altered metabolism of carbohydrates
The enormous physical and chemical changes that pregnancy triggers.

Morning sickness and your baby

Some women are concerned that the action of vomiting may threaten their unborn baby. Vomiting and retching may strain the abdominal muscles and cause localised aching and soreness, but the physical mechanics of vomiting won’t harm the baby. The fetus is perfectly cushioned inside its sac of amniotic fluid.

Numerous studies have discovered that moderate morning sickness is associated with a reduced risk of miscarriage. However, prolonged vomiting (that leads to dehydration and weight loss) can deprive your child of proper nutrition and increase the risk of your baby being underweight at birth.

If you have nausea and vomiting that will not stop, contact your doctor or midwife.

Severe morning sickness (hyperemesis gravidarum)

Severe morning sickness is known as hyperemesis gravidarum (HG), and can affect around one in 1,000 pregnant women. The symptoms of HG include repeated vomiting, weight loss and dehydration. Treatment usually involves hospitalisation, and the administering of intravenous liquids and nutrition.

The possible complications of untreated hyperemesis gravidarum include:
Electrolyte imbalances
Extreme depression and anxiety
Malnourishment of the fetus
Excessive strain on vital organs, including the liver, heart, kidneys and brain.

Managing morning sickness

Suggestions for coping with morning sickness include:
Don’t take drugs of any kind, unless your doctor knows you are pregnant and has prescribed specific medications.
Eat a few dry crackers or plain sweet biscuits before getting out of bed in the morning.
Don’t eat anything that you suspect will make you nauseous. In general high-carbohydrate meals are well tolerated.
Eat small meals regularly, as an empty stomach tends to trigger nausea.
It may help to avoid cooking or preparing foods.
Drink as much as you can manage. Sometimes sips of flat lemonade, diluted fruit juice, cordial, weak tea, ginger tea, clear soup or beef extract drinks are helpful. If none of these are bearable, try sucking on ice cubes.
Vitamin B6 supplements can be useful, but doses above 200 mg per day can actually be harmful. Follow your doctor’s advice.
Consider acupressure or acupuncture on the wrist.
Wear loose clothes that don’t constrict your abdomen.
Moving around may aggravate morning sickness. Rest whenever possible.

Seeing your doctor about morning sickness

Always seek medical advice if your morning sickness is severe, if you have lost a lot of weight quickly, or if you feel depressed or anxious. Treatment options can include drugs that won’t harm your developing baby.

Where to get help
Your doctor
Maternal and child health nurse

Things to remember
Around half to two-thirds of all pregnant women will experience morning sickness.
Possible causes include high levels of hormones, blood pressure fluctuations and changes in carbohydrate metabolism.
Severe morning sickness, called hyperemesis gravidarum, may require hospitalisation.
Symptoms of morning sickness may be relieved by eating a few dry crackers before you get up in the morning, avoiding foods and smells that make you nauseous, drinking plenty of fluids and choosing high-carbohydrate and high-protein foods.
Better Health Channel

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Natural therapies, alternative medicines? Natural IVF?

Alternative therapies and IVF?

Some of you may or may not be aware that we had some difficulties falling pregnant with my now gorgeous 20 month old healthy, happy, busy, boy!

I was told that I had no ‘eggs’ and that I would need to have hormone replacement therapy (HRT) along with IVF.

When I was given this news I was devastated. I thought it was the worst thing I could have ever heard. Such a blow to the ego, why are so women able to have babies so easily and I can’t I was asking myself?

Then anger set in and I was thinking of all the women who neglect their children or fall pregnant to keep or trap a partner. I has all these emotions were running through me. I was 33 years old. Married, trying to start a family with the guy I had been with for at the time 6 years. Why me?

I wasn’t going to let it defeat me. I am a stubborn and defiant personality and I certainly don’t like to loose nor be beat by something. To give up certainly wasn’t in me. I was willing to try anything prior to HRT and IVF.

Not because I am against it, but I wanted to try alternatives as I’d heard how straining on your body and mind both HRT and IVF are and with their costs and risks your still not guaranteed to fall pregnant, therefore is wanted to try other ‘possibilities’ first.

So I went to visit a Chinese Herbalist. He was so lovely, his English was broken but he understood my struggle. He tested my hormone levels via feeling my energies. No needles, no blood samples simply held his hands approx 15cm away from the outline of my arms and head and felt my bodies energies.

At first I thought this was Bizzar but i kept telling myself, whatever works! I really wanted a family with my husband and was willing to try anything!

He made up some specialised herbs for me to take as a tea and suggested I also take other vitamin supplements such as magnesium, iron, calcium, vitamin B and a few others. He also suggested acupuncture, a cleaner diet and meditation. I had used acupuncture previously for a sports injury but never meditated. I am a high energy person and the thought of meditation was a little overwhelming. I had to at least try though. Remembering everyone’s needs are different and these were what my body needed, no necessarily what everyone will need.

I read a few articles and books on self meditation, taking myself to a quiet place abc allowing my thoughts to ‘quieten’. This was very foreign to me and it took many attempts – about 10, before I actually succeeded in meditation. Blocking out sounds and not being distracted I found very challenging. I would meditate every evening. Sitting on my bed or laying. No TV on just me in the dark with my body still and listening to my heart beat. I would slowly tell each part of my body to relax, staring at my toes and working my way up to my brain, with each breath I would feel more calm and at ease with meditation and eventually I could lay alone meditating for an hour.

No I didn’t fall asleep but I would certainly feel relaxed. 🙂

My cleaner diet was, no alcohol, nothing with preservatives or as little as preservatives as possible, (basically nothing from a packet) more fruit, veg and meat. Less processed foods and lower starchy carbohydrates.

I was seeing SYDNEY IVF acupuncture in George street Sydney twice a week for acupuncture, meditating at home daily, eating clean and healthy and took a lot of stresses from my life. Including quitting my job which I loved but my boss was making my role difficult. (If you have been following my previous posts, this is the boss that pursued my friends, ended up dating one and spoke about her in a condescending and revolting manner.) – I quit as I could no longer stand his behaviour. I was unemployed approx a month before I was contacted by my most recent boss doing the same role but with a lot less stress involved , it’s a much larger and more professional organisation with wonderful supporting management and staff.

So with my new lifestyle I fell pregnant. I will admit it still took 7 months but I fell naturally. No chemical HRT no IVF naturally! I felt on top of the world.

So my advice is. If you are struggling to fall pregnant naturally don’t discount HRT and IVF however also don’t be dis heartened. If like me you are open to alternative medicine, go speak to a natural therapist or even an acupuncture specialist. They will be able to help put you in contact with the people who can hopefully help you bring a baby to this world.

I now have my wonderful little man whom I adore more than anything for and am extremely thankful and fragile to have him in my life. If I do encounter these hurdles again I will most certainly try alternative therapies again. 🙂