Tag Archives: engrossed

Hibernating

Hibernating.

We have all been that person who when we get a ‘new partner’ we hibernate with them. We spend all our ‘spare’ time with the new person and seem to ‘forget’ about our other friends.

What we forget though, is that our friends miss us.

I have only a handful of single friends left. Most of the people I share my time with are in similar situations as myself. Married with children or in long term relationships. The friends that are not married or in long term relationships seem to have such busy lives and perhaps forget that although we are still the same person, perhaps we just may be doing different things?

I love my friends dearly. I have only a few ‘great’ friends and one best friend and that’s fine with me. Those who I share my time with are important to me. I love them like family and will do anything to protect them and be there for them.

Recently I caught up with a really good friend of mine whom I hadn’t seen in almost 2 years. Yes we have swapped the occasional text message and I see all her photos and status updates on social media. However, we hadn’t physically seen each other in almost 2 years. Sad but true.

Was it any different when we caught up?

Nope – it felt as though we had only seen each other last week. That’s what I consider a true friendship. One that doesn’t require high maintenance yet still stands the test of time.

There had been many factors for the reasons that we hadn’t caught up. Her busy schedule – she is in a quite demanding professional role, me being a busy mum on 2 little ones, the distance between where we each live, and our relationships.

My friend has been the eternal single gal – god love her. She has had a few long term relationships, however hasn’t had a ‘serious’ relationship for many years. Not for any fault if her own, she is an amazing woman, she just hadn’t found someone whom she wanted to be an important part of her life and share her valuable time with. So when I hadn’t seen her or actually heard from her in a few months, I got suspicious. As I do 😉 and yup – I was right, she had found herself a man!

So why is it that we kind of ‘loose’ ourselves in a new relationship?

I get that our friends – well true friends, will always be there for us.

Do we feel like we need to have every waking moment with the new person so that they don’t escape or change their minds about us?

Or are we so engrossed in having a relationship that we push everything else aside to focus solely on the new person?

Or do we feel like we need to put extra effort in on the new partner?

Or perhaps we just feel so happy when we are with them that we forget how much time we are spending with them?

So many thoughts….

What are your thoughts?