Tag Archives: Advice

School age debate.

School age debate.

I know this is a topic, often a spoken about, not always a positive topic, yet a topic that everyone seems to have an opinion on. So I thought that I would ‘chime in’ also as recently there was a ‘heated’ debate about it in the kindergarten playground.

I was faced with a confronting and unwelcome conversation last week by a woman that I don’t know. I was standing in the kindergarten playground chatting with other kindergarten mothers about nothing in particular when a mother that I had never met before starting making comments about our children.

See, we all have children who started kindergarten this year, and we also coincidentally have children that are turning 3 this year some boys, some girls. So when this woman passed comment that our ‘babies’ will also be going through school together, I said “that’s great will your daughter be going to kindergarten 2020?”. Not realising I had just unleashed her favourite topic!

She quickly responded with ‘no, my daughter is going 2021, why would you send your daughter early?, I mean sending a child too young has so many negative effects on them, why would you do that to her?”. I almost felt like I was being personally attacked, or that I was making a terrible decision and possibly ruining my dear daughters life.

I was taken aback – which rarely happens, and because of my silence, this woman thought it was her right to then lecture me on all the negative reasons as to why I should wait and send my daughter to kindergarten when she is 5 turning 6. You see, in her opinion sending my daughter 4 turning 5 in the May, is way too young and will undoubtedly end with teen pregnancy, under age drinking, lack of intelligence, slow learning, being left out of rep sporting teams, being easily influenced by others, difficulties with learning and socialising, and her extensive list went on. And on. And on. (Her words)

I was horrified at her response. I mean. This is the first time I’d ever met her. What a front she has to lecture anyone on their family decisions and what is best for someone else’s children. Too opinionated for my liking, that is for sure.

It really put me in a weird mindset, it made me question my husband and my decision and left me feeling quite angry and deflated. This was mind you, first thing in the morning so it played on my mind quite a lot that day. I spoke to a few friends throughout the day to vent and also get their opinions, of whom I value, and they, my friends much like myself, are of similar mindset with the school age decisions.

I also spoke to my little mans kindergarten teacher later that afternoon as this woman’s righteousness was confronting. I wanted to speak to a teacher who deals with children of varying ages on a daily basis and this teacher also, has over 13 years primary school teaching behind her. The kindergarten teacher is also of the same mindset as myself. That is, that each child is individual and ready at their own pace and in their own time.

I think I will have a better idea as to when we should start her in kindergarten once she starts preschool, however at the moment, my little miss who is not yet 3, knows her alphabet, can count to 20, dresses and undresses herself, copies and repeats her big brothers sight words, mock reads books, is extremely social, not shy, is really confident, will sit colour and draw by herself, can hold a pen or pencil with correct pen grip, will listen and take instruction and can sit through a whole movie, I think I will be ready but time will tell.

All kids are in my view, are individual and each to their own, however with this woman’s rant it got me thinking of all the negative effects that sending a child to school 5 turning 6 May encounter.

A few that really stand out to me are,
– Being an adult doing their HSC.
– Being 18, which is legal age to drink in Australia, which may mean the 18 year old who is still in high school, can and possibly will go out drinking. Is drinking whilst at school appropriate?
– Being older and holding a drivers license which at involve having other school children driving with them.
– Being older and influencing younger students mindsets.
– Wanting to ‘grow up’ too young.
– Will they get distracted or bored easily from being older?

Look, I get that this is a very personal topic, I think that either way, sending your child at 4 or 5, if you are raising your children in a way that you feel appropriate and comfortable with, your child will make the right decisions. They will know what is acceptable and hopefully make good decisions. It’s very individual based on each child differently.

I see valid points from both sides, however what I didn’t appreciate was being ‘force fed’ this woman’s opinion and how forthcoming she was with telling me how terrible I was as a parent for even considering sending my daughter to kindergarten at age 4 with her birthday in May.

What are your thoughts?

 

Parental advice?

Ha ha ha!

Now I’m no one to be handing out parental advice, however I have had 2 different situations with my 2 very different children.

I received, and still do revive plenty of ‘advice’ from others. I listen yes, however I choose what I want to take on board and stuff I choose to pass on. We all have our own ideas on what is right or best for us, what we are willing to accept and what we are willing to try.

My first born, my now 3 year old boy. Well I de everything the ‘wrong’ way.
Perhaps because I was only learning myself? Perhaps because I couldn’t bare to hear him whimper, let alone cry?
Perhaps because he was my first born and I wanted to be awake all night? 😉😆😏 (not)

I’m not quite sure? However I would rock him to sleep every night, whilst I would pace up our hallway. I did this until he was 2 years old. I’d then carefully put him in his cot, if he would stir I’d then have my hand resting on his chest for ‘reassurance’. I’d then sit in the floor with my hand in between the cot slats (almost like a jail cell door) and slowly and gently pat him until he would go back to sleep. This could take hours (no I’m not joking)

He would also wake 5 or 6 times per night, sometimes more and then the whole ‘routine’ would start again. The picking up, holding, rocking, shushing, pacing the hallway, the resting hand, gentle pats whilst sitting on the floor and hand dropped through the side of the cot….. Over and over until he was fast asleep.

When I was almost due to have my second child I couldn’t bare the thought of doing this with 2 little ones. I thought I’d go crazy and not manage so we got an amazing sleep nanny in who helped with our little guy and after 4 nights of her advice. Guess what? He slept through and to this day, he still does. He goes to bed at 6:15pm, is asleep by 6:30pm and sleeps through until about 6:30am. With no pacing, no patting, no shushing , nothing. We brush his teeth, read a book, then it’s lights out with him alone in his bed calming himself to sleep. No pitter patter coming out, nothing. What a game changer!

Sure I miss the extra cuddles and laying with him, however I know it’s good for him to self settle and good for me to not be over tired. Amazing how much more energy I have and less snappy I am with getting a good nights sleep and rest. For the both of us. Because he also needs his sleep in order to grow, learn and be attentive and energy to play.

Our sleep nanny is a wonderful woman Jenny. I have attached her website below for those in Sydney NSW Australia, interested in her services.

Rest assured when number 2 came along, I didn’t do any of that. And you know what? She survived. I survived and we are both still alive and well.

She may just be a ‘better’ sleeper. She is a different person yes. From 4 weeks old she slept through the night. 6pm until 6:30am every night. Now I’m not telling you this to brag. I’m telling you this as all children are different.

When my little girl had her 4 month growth spurt or as some would call it a ‘sleep regression’ it was hard. She did wake for 2 weeks straight every 2-3 hours every night and I was beside myself as I was used to getting a good nights rest and a full 8 hours sleep. So I called in Jenny again. And, within 3 nights our little girl was sleeping through again.

She had her first birthday over the weekend just passed and has slept through every night since she was 5 months old. Thanks to Jenny!

Jenny didn’t punish her, didn’t have her scream the house down, none of that. She basically monitored her over night (let me sleep through) and then left me with her tips / ideas on what may work to get our little girl to sleep through, and yep, they worked.

Now this may not be for everyone. However I was feeling overwhelmed, I needed a full nights sleep for my sanity and also to re connect with my husband.

We would be sitting watching TV or eating a lovely meal, or just spending time together and each night, without fail, the pitter patter of little feet.

I can totally relate to this ‘Scary Mommy’ post. Gosh I think most of us can. It’s worth the read for the little giggle at least. 😉😊

http://www.scarymommy.com/earlier-bedtimes-healthy-children/
http://www.solvebabies.com.au

Stress free toddler!

Being a parent is the hardest job I’ve ever had, however by far the most rewarding.

All the academic qualifications can never prepare you for being a parent. A new adventure and or challenges on a daily or sometimes hourly basis.

Hold tight though, they are only little once and these ‘testing’ times will pass and perhaps we will look back and wonder why we thought they were so hard?

http://www.yummymummyclub.ca/blogs/andrea-nair-connect-four-parenting/20150420/handling-stress-of-having-toddler

Keeping your energy levels up!

Everyone is familiar with all-out feeling or that exhausted day (or night) when no matter how enticing something can be, we just can’t psych ourselves up to go.

What can be harder to recognize is a low-grade energy drain. In this case, you may not necessarily feel the classic signs of exhaustion. Much like achy muscles or that all-over tired feeling. What you do experience is an increasing lack of get-up-and-go for many of the activities you used to love.

You may also find it harder to concentrate on normal every day tasks, and, eventually, you can also find your patience grows short and your level of frustration rises, even when confronted with seemingly simple every day things.

Top 10 Energy Boosters
1. Increase Your Magnesium Intake

Eating a balanced diet can help ensure your vitamin and mineral needs are met. But if you still find yourself too to tired you could have a slight magnesium deficiency.

Magnesium is a mineral that is needed for more than 300 biochemical reactions in your body, including breaking down glucose into energy, So when levels are even a little low, energy can drop.

It’s known that women with magnesium deficiencies have higher heart rates and required more oxygen to do physical tasks than they did after their magnesium levels were restored. That means their bodies were working harder which, over time, can leave you feeling even more tired and depleted.

The recommended daily intake of magnesium is around 300 milligrams for women and 350 milligrams for men. To make sure you’re getting enough try Adding a handful of almonds, hazelnuts or cashews to your daily diet. This will also Increase your intake of whole grains, particularly bran cereal. Eat more fish, especially halibut.

2. Walk Around the Block

While it may seem as if moving about when you feel exhausted is the quickest route to feeling more exhausted, the opposite is true. Experts say that increasing physical activity, particularly walking, increases energy, you will also be surprised what fresh air will do for your brain function.

I personally like walking because it’s free, easily accessible, easy to do, doesn’t need training or equipment and you can do it anywhere.

By taking a brisk 10-minute walk it will not only increase your energy, but the effects lasted up to two hours. And when the daily 10-minute walks continued for three weeks, overall energy levels and mood were lifted.

3. Take a Power Nap

Research has shown that both information overload and pushing our brains too hard can zap energy. But studies by the National Institutes of Mental Health found that a 60-minute “power nap” can not only reverse the mind-numbing effects of information overload, it may also help us to better retain what we have learned.

4. Don’t Skip Breakfast or Any Other Meal actually.

People who eat breakfast are almost always certain to being in a better mood, and have more energy throughout the day. By breaking the fast soon after rising supplies your body with a jolt of fuel that sets the tone for the whole day. Also by eating breakfast you are also kick starting your metabolism. This will also help you to burn fats throughout the rest of the day.

5. Reduce your Stress and Deal With Anger levels.

Stress is the result of anxiety, and anxiety uses up a whole lot of our energy and causes negativity within our lives that is also draining of our energy levels.
6. Drink More Water and Less Alcohol

You may already know that it’s easy to confuse signals of hunger with thirst we think we need food when we really need water. But did you know that thirst can also masquerade as fatigue. A quick glass of water not only satisfy’s hunger but will help keep your brain alert longer.

7. Eat More Whole Grains and Less Sugar

The key here is keeping blood sugar balanced so energy is constant.

We all know that When you’re eating a sweet food, you get a quick spike in blood sugar, which gives you an initial burst of energy or rush. However that’s also followed by a just as fast drop in blood sugar, which in turn can leave you feeling even more tired that in the beginning.

8. Have a Snack

snacking is more than just eating between meals. Have something healthy that combines protein, a little fat and some fiber, like peanut butter on a whole-wheat cracker, or some yogurt with a handful of nuts.

The carbohydrate offer a quick pick-me-up, the protein keeps your energy up, and the fat makes the energy last.

9. Make It a Latte

Pair a quick caffeine hit with the sustaining power of protein by having a low-fat latte instead of just a cup of coffee.

The milk turns your java into a protein drink, which provides not only extra energy, but extra calcium, which is good for your bones. Combine it with a handful of almonds, the healthy fat should also satisfy your hunger.

10. Check Your Thyroid Function and Complete Blood Cell Count

It certainly won’t provide an instant boost. But if you’re constantly low on energy especially if you feel sluggish and still tired even after a good night’s rest.

You can also to your doctor about a blood test for thyroid dysfunction as well as anemia if you are concerned.

Thyroid can be a particular problem for women it often develops after childbirth and frequently during the perimenopause but a simple blood test can verify if this is your problem. If you’re diagnosed with low thyroid function, medication can bring your body back up to speed.

In anemia a reduction in red blood cells can mean your body isn’t getting the level of oxygen necessary to sustain energy. So, you tire more easily.

This can sometimes occur during a woman’s reproductive years, particularly if she has a very heavy menstrual cycle.

Again with any health issues. Always consult your doctor first.