Defining success

Defining success

How do you define your success?

Success can be measured on many levels and depending on your personality, I believe success is also measured by what you personally feel is important to you and makes you feel successful.

I personally measure my success on my happiness and my little family. Including my husband, little man and soon to be little princess.

I am happy in my life, I may not have much but seeing my little guys smile each and every day lightens my world.

Also having a supportive husband who appreciates me being home and being the ‘keeper of the house’ and ‘stay at home mum’ is important to me. I would struggle if I had to leave my little man each and every day. I love being hands on with him and being able to watch him explore and grow each and every day.

I know many people who measure their happiness on other things. These things can include –

Money / wealth
How much they earn, if they are not earning a certain annual amount they don’t feel successful. Recently a comment was passed at my husband towards his salary and that it wasn’t in the ‘commenters’ eyes, a passable salary. The persons comment basically insinuated that what my husband earns is pittance and therefore he isn’t successful. I personally find this shallow but again each person measures success differently.

Happiness
I measure my success on how happy my family are and as long as we have each other, I feel successful and complete.

Assets
I have always said to my husband that I could live in a shoe box as long as I had him and my little man. I don’t need fancy cars or fancy clothes or a big home to feel successful. Again many people do feel that the bigger the home or fancier car they have or perhaps living in a particular suburb – the more successful they feel. We do live in a material world but it’s sad that some peoples mindset is that unless they have the big home they are not as worthy as the next person.

Family
Along with happiness my success is family orientated. I don’t need my family to be successful financially. As long as they are happy I feel happy. I personally don’t believe that you need a successful family to be successful yourself. Your parents money or family money doesn’t make you a better person nor does it make you more successful, I believe in working hard yourself and achieving things for yourself makes you more appreciative.

Materialistic belongings
Living in SYDNEY, a lot of people are designer obsessed and feel they need certain designer pieces to feel successful. Spending thousands of dollars on a particular item to make them feel good about themselves or boost their personal confidence is fine, however having materialist items does not make you a good person. I know this person who is always in designer things and frowns upon chain store clothing. They wear lots of designer jewellery and pass comments on the size of others engagement rings etc. I find this shallow and feel these people have insecurities which is why they measure their success on materialistic belongings. Just because you don’t have a 10 carat diamond ring doesn’t mean that you don’t have a 10 carat heart.

I believe that being a good person is so much more than being focussed on assets, finances and material belongings.

You can’t take your diamond rings and fancy cars with you when you die right?

What I’m not saying is – don’t strive to be successful but measure your successes by things that are worthy.

If you feel you need the big salary to feel competent, or the fast car or latest designer thing. Sure go get those. However I think that you can also measure your success if you are humble and happy in other things.

Majority of the world live in poverty and are happy. They base their successes on other things that the fortunate don’t always understand.

She is here!

For all my loyal readers I want to apologies for my lack of posts lately.

I’ve been a little pre occupied of and I hope that you understand why, my little princess arrived 3 weeks early!

It has been a whirlwind of emotion and I am yet again besotted.

I thought I knew what love was when approx 2.5years ago I welcomed my gorgeous lil man into this world.

Today I feel absolutely besotted, proud, fulfilled and over joyed with love and happiness all over again.

My lil family is now complete.
Two precious little cherubs to love, adore, enjoy, watch grow and protect for forever more.

Let me take you through my journey.

I had been on weekly ultrasounds and checkups with my midwife as my little miss was measuring small. On the lower 10th percentile on the growth chart which had our midwife and obstetric is slightly concerned.

Now hubby not myself are big units however our amazing little man was born 3.53kg and 53cm long. Our lil miss was measuring approx 2.3kg. Quite a big difference.

After my ECG – where they turned my little princess successfully she engaged straight away, I was displayed though however at that time, I could have dilated easily as my cervix was apparently ‘ripe’ and ‘soft’.

Going back to those past 2 weeks, I had my regular weekly ultrasound on the Tuesday followed by my midwife appointment on the Thursday. After the appointment I had a CTG which is a monitor that listens to the baby’s heart. My little miss had a strong healthy and regular heart beat which was reassuring.

She was still measuring small so I then went onto daily check ups. So with my little man, packed up for a few hours we were in the hospital room. Mummy hooked up to these monitoring machines to check little miss and my little man – who was so well behaved, watching a DVD and snacking.

After being monitored for 6 days straight we were advised that our little miss hadn’t grown within 2 weeks, not gained any weight nor had her head or stomach circumference had changed and that the best and safest option would be an induction.

The induction was set for 3pm on Wednesday. I had my bag packed my little miss’s bag packed and my mother had came to stay with my little man.

I was filled with various emotion as id never left my little man before for any longer than 10 hours. So leaving him over night I was heart broken. I was however exited that the time has come to meet my little girl.

After getting the brief on how I was going to be induced I was feeling very nervous.

The obstetrician decided that cervadil was going to be the better option as its a slow release. Releasing 2mg of the induction drug every 6 hours over a 12 hour period. A long process but as my lil miss was small they didn’t want complications and wanted it to be as stress free as possible. Well that didn’t really happen….

After the cervadil was inserted approx 2 hours later my contractions started.

They were quite intense and were lasting a few minutes each time and approx 15 minutes apart. With this I got cramps down my right leg and in my right bottox cheek – very painful. The contractions were coming on closer and closer then at 10pm after 5 hours of fast intense contractions my little miss was distressed and her heart was beating irregular.

They had to stop the labor and calm her. They took the cervadil out and I was put on a drip and given morphine to stop the contractions as I was also still not dilating. I was told to rest over night and they would try again in the morning.

I was quite exhausted and tried my best to sleep but was being constantly monitored and slept with the CTG machine on me which also limited my comfort level but that was nothing as I wanted what was best for my little girl.

The next morning the midwife and obstetrician decided that perhaps the best thing to do would be to break my waters and see how my body reacts and if I dilate that way.

Well at 9:25am my waters were broken and within 15 minutes I was in full on contractions again.

The contractions were lasting over 3 minutes and were only 2 minutes apart. Very fast and very intense. They became faster and longer and closer together. The whole labor only lasted 2 hours as my little miss was born at 11:25am.

As the contractions were so intense I had no time for pain relief. I had gas only. Which helped a little but as the contractions were so intense I struggled to breath and catch my breath so was also ‘blacking out’ due to the pain. Within the 2hours that I was in labour, my husband recalls me blanking out 4 times.

I also hemoraghed and lost a great amount of blood that required me to have 6 bags of fluid administered via a drip followed by a iron infusion that took over 6 hours via a drip. They considered a blood transfusion but we’re hoping that the fluids would work, which they did.

My little miss was born at 1.88kg and 44.5cm long. Teeny tiny but healthy! Yay!

I was exhausted and felt completely out of it, my little miss was also exhausted as she was so small she was tube fed for the first 3 days. I expressed my breast milk and it was syringed into a tube that went down her nose.

I felt relived that she was ok and born strong and healthy however also was upset that she was tube fed. It was for the best though and did only last 3 days.

After 5 nights in the hospital we were discharged and allowed home. Back with my little man and husband. Back into my comfort zone and able to settle into my family of 4.

I feel so complete and in love. I have these 2 amazing children whom I love more than imaginable. No words to describe the happiness or fulfilment that I have for these 2 little people.

Since being home my baby girl has had continual weight gain and is now 2.14kg her 00000 clothing is too big but she is going to grow into them.

Stay tuned and I promise to write again soon.

Dilation

So I have approx 19 days until my little princess arrives. Well her due date is 19 days away 🙂

As I get closer to my due date I’m getting lots of questions, are you dilated? Are you having contractions? Are you experiencing labour symptoms? etc

With my first child (little boy) the labour was only 5 hours and apart from being posterior then needing vacuum and forceps, it was pretty straight forward. I actually didn’t know that I was in labour.

So this time around, I’m really not too sure what to expect so of course, I’ve been doing lots and lots of reading!

An interesting read that I came across is the article below on ‘dilation’ not sure I’d check myself however if your expecting and as curious as I am, have a read.
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Dilation – How To Check Without Checking

Recently I have noticed a few blogs writing about dilation and it’s benefits, as well as how to do it in other ways besides simple vaginal exams. This is my take on the subject, modified from the hand out that I have available for my clients.

Why Check?
One of the biggest repeat questions a doula/caregiver can hear during labor and birth is ‘how far along am I’. Some women would prefer not to know, some women could care less, and some women desire this knowledge almost habitually.

As with any intervention in labor and birth, cervical checks carry risk. The risks include: increased risk of infection, PROM, false readings (i.e. human error), and regret/disappointment at any ‘lack’ of dilation.

Regardless of women’s reasons for wanting to know their dilation, it is helpful for a doula/care provider to have more than one trick/way of knowing where mom may be, beyond timing contractions.

Some methods that can help a caregiver or doula know how dilated a woman is during her labor include:
Teach self exams
Sounds she makes
Smell of the room/mom
Show
Emotions
The bottom line
Physical Make-Up
Fundal height
Symphysis Crease
Mexican Hot Legs
Pressure
Methods

All of these methods are generalities. It is important to remember that women are not textbooks, they are organic, living, evolving organisms that there are many exceptions to every rule. Each of these cannot be applied to all women.

Self Exams
I have found that the best explanation of self exams can be found from Gloria Lemay. It is a practically applicable explanation that gets good results.
“The best way to do it when hugely pregnant is to sit on the toilet with one foot on the floor and one up on the seat of the toilet. Put two fingers in and go back towards your bum. The cervix in a pregnant woman feels like your lips puckered up into a kiss. On a non-pregnant woman it feels like the end of your nose. When it is dilating, one finger slips into the middle of the cervix easily (just like you could slide a finger into your mouth
while puckering for a kiss). As the dilation progresses, the inside of that hole becomes more like a taut elastic band and by 5 cm dilated (5 finger widths) it is a perfect rubbery circle like one of those Mason jar rings that you use for canning, and about that thick.” – Gloria Lemay

Sounds of Birth
A non-vaginal indicator that can help to detect progress is notable sounds that a woman makes in labor.

Usually, early labor (0-4cm) means little to no ‘birth’ noise; mom can talk with little to some effort through a contraction.

Around 4-5cm dilation (for a primip) talk with be rather difficult to near impossible, noises may still be quiet, but consistently open voweled or a resonating hum.

5-7cm will typically be presented with louder noises, near to completely impossible to talk through a contraction, and sounds may become repetitive or staccato.

If a woman is a silent laborer, a good way to get a handle on her vocal indicators is to explain what you are about to do… then wait until a contraction starts, and ask a question that necessitates a sentence-long answer. The way in which she is able or unable to answer you during a contraction should be rather reliable.

Smell
Many birth professionals have spoken about the smell of birth.

Birth smells come about around 6-8cm dilation and are a very good indicator of good active labor. When a mom says that she wants to transfer to her place of birth around 6-8cm, I typically will go by smell and mom’s emotions.

The active labor smell is not so much the earthy/wet smell of amniotic fluid, and is not the sweet smell on a woman’s breath during labor (ever notice a laboring mom’s breath always smells sweet?)..

Instead, this smell is deep, dusky (not musky), heavy, familiar… the smell of deep and ancient work. It is something that is hard to explain, but something to definitely be on the look (smell) out for until you have familiarized yourself with it and can use this as a good indicating factor of active labor.

Show
A woman may or may not ‘show’ any bloody or mucousy discharge at the onset of labor, but blood and mucous often come in copious amounts, usually during contractions, when a woman is around 6-8cm. If a woman’s water broke earlier in the labor, you may see a second gush around 6cm.

Emotions
Early labor (1-4cm, oftentimes) often means mom is in the “this is it” stage – happy, excitable, a good sense of humor, perhaps even denial that she is really in labor.

Moving into active labor (4-6cm, oftentimes) often means that mom is still smiley and may even laugh at little things being said between contractions. Moving in and out of conversation as her contractions go and come.

Active labor (5-7cm, oftentimes) generally means she is more irritated at commonplace conversation or people trying to distract her with quips. It may take her quite awhile after a contraction leaves to become ‘re-acclimated’ to the room, or she may choose to simply remain in her birthing space and not interact with the room. (an aside, the room should be acclimating to her, although it is not always the case, unfortunately).

Around transition (usually, 7cmish) even between contractions, a woman can become doubtful, unable to make concrete decisions (“I don’t know” in response to questions), or irrational, a good indicator that mom is on the homestretch.

This method can be tricky, though, as this ‘emotional mapping’ can be skewed from a babies position or a woman’s labor make-up.

If it is from baby settling in a ‘malpresentation’, a mom might experience both an early transition (anywhere from 2cm to 4cm dilation, depending on if she is a primip or multip) and a later transition.

Depending on her labor make-up, some women can have an ‘early transition’ (4-5cm), especially for long-latent early labor patterns with discomfort disproportionate to her cervical dilation, but it will often still mean rapid dilation to complete.

Bottom/Purple Line
A study conducted and published in the Lancet hypothesized that the purple line that ‘grows’ up the natal cleft can be a great indicator of cervical dilatation. The line begins at the anal margin at the start of labour and rises like a “mercury thermometer”.

When it reaches the top, the woman is fully dilated. The authors propose that an “increase in intrapelvic pressure causes congestion in the … veins around the sacrum, which, in conjunction with the lack of subcutaneous tissue over the sacrum, results in this line of red purple discoloration”.
The best way to describe this is, looking at the anus, a purple line will appear and, throughout labor, move up the natal cleft (butt crack for us laypeople)
The picture shown at right is a fully dilated woman and her purple line.

Physical Make-Up
Many women will find that, as they get very close to the pushing stage, they may exhibit signs similar to the flu. If a mom suddenly feels the urge to vomit or complains of nausea, has a flushed face and feels warm, and/or begins trembling uncontrollably, mom may be at the cusp of second stage. Vomiting alone can be emotions, hormones, or fatigue alone. Flushed face is a good sign of 6-7cm, when noticed alone. And trembling uncontrollably, alone, might mean fatigue or fever. These indicators are most reliable when 2 or all 3 are noticed together.

Other physical indicators of 6cm and beyond:
involuntary curling of toes during contractions, even when the rest of her body is loose and relaxed (6-8cm)
if standing, instead of curling her toes, mom may stand on her toes while leaning over something (6-8cm)
goose bumps on her bottom (buttocks) and upper thighs (9-10cm)

Fundal Height
Anne Frye’s Volume II of Holistic Midwifery speaks of the fundal height of being a very reliable indicator of mom’s cervical dilation.

When the uterus contracts, it swells upwards and pulls the cervix upward with it, causing more dilation. Around 40 weeks, you can get around 5 finger-breadths of measurement between the fundus and the xyphoid.

As mom dilates, the distance from the xyphoid to the fundus decreases at a rate of about 2cm per fingerbreadths. This way of measuring is not as reliable in primips, but much more reliable in multips. When there is about 1 finger-width or less of space between the fundus and xiphoid, mom is near to at 10 cm dilation.

To do this, have mom (or partner) ‘mark’ her measurement at the first thought of labor. Taking into consideration her starting point (from prior VEs (Vaginal Exams)), use this as a start point.

Unfortunately, this assessment during labor must be done at the height of a contraction and mom must be on her back. Using the chart below, determine fingerbreadths (fb) between the fundus and xiphoid:
5 fb = no dilation
4 fb = 2 cm
3 fb = 4 cm
2 fb = 6 cm
1 fb = 8 cm
0 fm = complete

Symphysis Crease
Late dilation can be measured by watching the symphysis crease. It’s visible mostly in mom’s who have lower BMI prepregnancy. As labor progresses and babies shoulder’s descend along with dilation, a line/crease will become visible directly above (parallel to) the symphysis. It will become wider latitudinally as labor progresses.

Around transition, it will be about 3/4 of the way across. If the line is nearly all the way across, mom is most likely pretty close to, or already fully, dilated and will probably start pushing soon.

To do this, check right above mom’s symphysis (pubic bone). If there is a line at all, mom is probably at least 5cm. If you are working with a woman who is intent on laboring at home as long as possible, the crease may be a good indicator for her labor, a drawback is that it can also mean ‘too late’.

Another drawback to this is if baby is riding high throughout the early and active labor stage (aka a ‘late descender’).

Mexican Hot Legs
As the birthing woman’s body works harder, blood is withdrawn from the extremities to be utilized by the womb. Thus, the woman’s legs get progressively colder from the ankle to the knee as labor progresses. At the start of birth, the whole leg will be warm. At around 5cm, the leg will be coldre from the ankle to around mid-calf than it is above the calf. Once the whole leg feels coldre up to the knee, then the urge to push should shortly follow.

This technique is less reliable if the woman is having an epidural, as the drugs will also affect the temperature of the hands and legs. If a woman is birthing in water then she’d need to be on dry land for around 20 minutes to allow the temperature in her legs to be measured accurately. – Kath Harbisher

Pressure
As baby descends, pressure will be felt at different levels on her back. This will not necessarily give dilation information, but will help in determining position/station of baby within the pelvic outlet. This pressure will move from the rim of the pelvis all the way down onto the coccyx (tailbone).

As doulas can tell you, as mom continues to dilate, and baby continues to move down the pelvis, the pressure she feels will go lower. This is why back massages turn into butt massages turn into tailbone massages. 🙂

By the time that mom is 8-10cm and 0 to +1 station, the small rectangular spot of mom’s buttocks (tailbone area) will bow outward as her pelvis makes room for babies decent. This usually means that, if you are at home and mom was planning a hospital or birth center birth, you very well may have waited too long.

Another indicator is that, if mom is feeling pressure between her legs, vomits, and her water breaks simultaneously, she is probably 7-8cm or more.

A final indicator is, regardless of dilation, if a mom is passing stool involuntarily with her contractions, whether she has the urge to push or not, she is either holding a posterior baby, fully dilated and about to start pushing, or baby is at a low station (more common without full dilation in multips).

In Conclusion
Dilation of the cervix can tell us how far open you are, but not how close you are to the destination of birthing your baby. Listening to your body and the cues it gives can help us know where you are at in your journey though. Some women’s journeys take them through jogs and shortcuts, while others are mountainous day-hikes.

More than anything else, these tools can help women to plan their next steps on their birthing journeys; when to move to their expected place of birth, when to enter the birthing pool, what their labor pattern might indicate, what is true labor vs what is practice.

Domestic violence.

Domestic violence

Domestic violence comes in many difference forms. It’s not always physical with having a black eye or broken ribs. It can be emotional abuse on any level and can happen at any age.

Recently Rose Batty won Australian of the year 2015 for her part in bringing more awareness into communities. Such a wonderful woman. Rose Batty lost her only child, her 11 year old son to the violent hands of her ex partner, her sons father.

The father who supposedly loved his son beat him with a cricket bat until he died in a public place in 2014. This is domestic violence.

I also recently watched a 60 minutes program on Jessica Silva. This strong, brave woman was in a horrible abusive relationship with an emotionally and physically abusive man did baby years and at one stage, they decide to face a child to help the relationship but as Jessica found out, it didn’t help at all. Not saying that she shouldn’t have had her child, however I personally don’t believe that abusive people can change easily.

This woman was in a relationship with a monster, he was also an illegal drug user and also used steroids which caused him to have ‘roid rage’ not that this is ever an excuse.

Jessica eventually ended the relationship only to have him make threats to kill her, their son and her family. Terrible behaviour by someone who again supposedly loves and cares for you.

Eventually when he tried, Jessica fought back and she ended up stabbing him to death.

Is this self defence or murder?

Jessica was jailed for 8 months and charged with murder. The charges were then dropped to manslaughter and the jury have handed her a lesser sentence as they had evidence of the abusive relationship and also his death threats.

Jessica’s phone had also been tapped by NSW police which also showed her fearful for her life and this lead to her self defence.

The psychologists on this case also called Jessica’s situation ‘battered wife syndrome’.

Definition –
Battered person syndrome is a physical and psychological condition of a person who has suffered (usually persistent) emotional, physical, or sexual abuse from another person.[1] It is classified as ICD-9 code 99
Battered person syndrome” not elsewhere classified (NEC).
The condition is the basis for the battered spouse defense that has been used in cases of physically and psychologically abused spouses who have killed their abusers. The condition was first researched extensively by Lenore E. Walker, who used Martin Seligman’s learned helplessness theory to explain why abused spouses stayed in destructive relationships.

When Battered Person Syndrome (BPS) manifests as PTSD, it consists of the following symptoms: (a) re-experiencing the battering as if it were recurring even when it is not, (b) attempts to avoid the psychological impact of battering by avoiding activities, people, and emotions, (c) hyperarousal or hypervigilance, (d) disrupted interpersonal relationships, (e) body image distortion or other somatic concerns, and (f) sexuality and intimacy issues.

Additionally, repeated cycles of violence and reconciliation can result in the following beliefs and attitudes:[8]

The abused thinks that the violence was his or her fault.
The abused has an inability to place the responsibility for the violence elsewhere.
The abused fears for her/his life, and/or, the lives of loved ones whom the abuser might or has threatened to harm (e.g., children-in-common, close relatives or friends).
The abused has an irrational belief that the abuser is omnipresent and omniscient.

Domestic violence is also not just stereotyped into lower socioeconomic areas or the uneducated. Domestic abuse / violence can happen in the most affluent homes and be inflicted by the most charming and intelligent of people.

It can start with name calling or bickering, then lead to a grab or a push.

There are many different forms of domestic violence and in most cases the abuser or person whom is the violent one, is suffering from a mental illness which has them feel or believe that what they are doing is fine and bit wrong in anyway.

When I say mental illness, I mean it can be self inflicted by taking illicit drugs or can be schizophrenic, bipolar, someone with anger management issues, low self esteem or even depression.

I’m absolutely not saying this gives them the right to behave this way as I personally condone domestic violence in all forms, I’m just saying that these people are generally not right themselves which in some occasions have them believe that they are actually not doing any wrong.

Domestic violence can also be called intimate partner violence.

It does not have to be within the home either to be classified as domestic violence. It can be a form of violence that can occur within any relationship (family or intimate partner). Domestic violence is about power and control and there are many ways this control can be expressed.

If someone is hurting you it can be very scary and it may be hard to know how you can stop it. It is important to remember that no one has the right to be violent towards you and there are people out there who can help.

When I was younger I was in a horrible relationship where my boyfriend at the time would emotionally abuse me telling me that I was fat, unattractive and he felt sorry for me which is why he continued our relationship as no one else would want me. I was 20 at the time and still quite vulnerable and insecure. He would constantly put me down and tell me to diet and exercise and nothing that I ever did was acceptable for him.

It wasn’t until the night that he slapped my face so hard tears rolled from my eyes like rain and he grabbed my throat that I fought back. I also don’t condemn violence but I kicked him in the face so that he would let me go. Needless to say he didn’t take that well and we ended up going out separate ways not long after but I also vowed that no man would ever belittle me or be violent towards me either emotionally or physically again.

Every day in Australia and across the world, abuse is happening. In Australia alone over 22 women have died at the hands of abuse this year alone – we are only the 4th month in.

This equates to approx 6 women per month or one per week, are loosing their life’s to domestic violence.

Such a high statistic that we don’t really hear about nor is it well publicised. Why?
Shouldn’t this be well reported?
Drug offences are recorded as is sport, why not domestic violence?

Below is a link that I happened to stumble across. Very sad and very recent.

http://m.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/nsw/woman-dead-after-horrific-domestic-assault-injuries-in-quakers-hill/story-fni0cx12-1227326073181

“Over 12 months, on average, one woman is killed every week as a result of intimate partner violence. A woman is most likely to be killed by her male partner in her home. Domestic and family violence is the principle cause of homelessness for women and their children.”

Some types of abuse are:

Physical – If someone is hurting you, or threatening to hurt you, a loved one or a pet, then you will need to take some action.

Emotional – This form of violence is often unrecognised and can be very hurtful.

Economic – Having money and being able to make decisions about it, is one means of being independent. If someone is controlling your money, keeping you financially dependent, or making you ask for money unreasonably, then this is a form of violence.

Social – Social violence occurs in relationships that often include other forms of violence. If someone is insulting you or teasing you in front of other people, keeping you isolated from family and friends, controlling what you do and where you go, then they are being violent and you may need to take some action.

Spiritual – This type of violence involves a situation where you are not allowed to have your own opinions about religion, cultural beliefs, and values, or your spirituality is manipulated to keep you feeling powerless.

If you or someone you know is in a situation or relationship that is abusive in any way, shape or form. There is help.

Never feel alone.

I know it can be scary and overwhelming but there is always help and you do not have to put up with it nor stay in that situation.

I’ve copied some links below that you may find helpful.

Remember to be strong and know that you don’t deserve to be treated that way, no one does.

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm

http://au.reachout.com/what-is-domestic-violence

http://www.humanservices.gov.au/customer/subjects/domestic-and-family-violence

http://www.dvrcv.org.au/support-services/national-services

http://m.whiteribbon.org.au/finding-help

http://lukebattyfoundation.com.au